Frequently Asked Questions

We’d like to address a couple of the recurring questions that family members have asked us over the many years of providing treatment.

How long will my loved one be in treatment?
Is there anything I can do to help myself while my loved one is in treatment?
Why are clients not allowed to use their phone or computers for the first 30 days?
What do I do when my loved one wants to leave treatment?
What should I do when my loved one calls and begins complaining about staff at the facility?
What do I say if I don’t know how to respond to a question?
What if my loved one tells me they are bored?

How long will my loved one be in treatment?

According to studies, the longer in treatment the better chance in recovery. 90 days of residential extended care followed with transitional living and outpatient services is what we typically recommend.

Is there anything I can do to help myself while my loved one is in treatment?

Yes. There are 12 step meetings called Al-anon and CODA (Codependents anonymous) which are great resources for family members of loved ones with addictions. These meetings will help give you the support you need and deserve. You may want to seek out professional help form a therapist. Our Case Manager and Primary Therapist can help you find a professional in your area. Remember, your loved one is in a safe place and now you can relax and be a part of life. Go out with friends, go to a movie and enjoy yourself.

Why are clients not allowed to use their phone or computers for the first 30 days?

The first 30 days of treatment is the time for the client to detox not only from drugs and alcohol, but from life, technology and work. We want the clients to have this time to engage with their Treatment Team and peers.
We know it is hard not to have this contact, but let us assure you, they are being well taken care of. Your loved one’s Case Manager will call you on a weekly basis to keep you informed as to how your loved one is adapting. Clients and families can mail letters to one another as often as needed. The most important part of treatment for your loved one is to realize they need support from others. If you are always supporting them, they will never reach out to their Treatment Team or peers. Please remember you too deserve some down time. We know you have spent years focusing on what they were doing and ensuring they were safe. Now, it’s time to take care of yourself.

What do I do when my loved one wants to leave treatment?

Remember, treatment is uncomfortable and one of the most difficult decisions you and your loved one have had to make. Staying in treatment through that uncomfortable first couple of weeks may be even harder. While this is difficult to hear, your loved one may want to leave treatment in the first 10-14 days and we want you to be prepared and realistic about this very real possibility. Common reasons you can expect to hear are:

Referring your loved one to their counselor is often the right move.

Referring your loved one to their counselor is often the right move.

  • I am not as sick as the other clients
  • I don’t use/drink as much as they do
  • I don’t need help. I can do this on my own
  • They are not paying attention to me

These are some of the most common but the list can go on and on…..

Ask your loved one to speak with his or her counselor/case manager or therapist. Again, we know it is so very difficult to watch a loved one struggle, but you must allow the process of treatment enough time to work. Now is the time to hold your boundaries against the disease of addiction that is trying, once again, to keep your loved one sick. The most important thing to do is to hold the line! Let them know you cannot help them to leave. Be encouraging with statements such as “I know you can do this and I believe in you.” Also let them know that you trust the treatment team and their recommendations.
As always, we are here to support you as well. Please feel free to contact us with any questions or concerns you may have.

What should I do when my loved one calls and begins complaining about staff at the facility?

Ask your loved one to talk with their therapist. Have them speak up for themselves rather than have you communicate their concerns. If your loved one continues to complain, please contact the case manager to set up a conference call.

What do I say if I don’t know how to respond to a question?

You are human and not expected to know all the answers to questions. It is okay to state that to the client and then encourage them to ask a treatment team member. Here is an example of what you could say: “I know this is hard work and I am so encouraged that you are committed to doing this, but I really don’t know what to say about… Maybe you could ask your therapist.”

What if my loved one tells me they are bored?

It is nearly impossible for a client to be bored if they are invested in their recovery and working the program. Clients are in various groups and lectures throughout the day. They also have assignments they are working on. Encourage them to share this with their therapist.